Monday, September 30, 2013

Come to Me - Goo Goo Dolls

Forgive this band for having a strange name. Please.

I have been a fan of the Goo Goo Dolls pretty much my entire life. This is probably because my mother loved them ever since they were featured in an episode of Sesame Street. Amazing how that works out. 

I heard this song just this morning on my way to work, and I said, "This is a cool song. It sounds like John Rzeznick," (The lead singer of the Goo Goo Dolls)

My mother didn't think so. "Hm. It sounds like him, but I don't think it is,"

"I think its the Goo Goo Dolls,"

She didn't think so. 

Cue DJ at the end of the song, verifying that it was, indeed, the Goo Goo Dolls.

This might be the most beautiful song I've heard by them.

Enjoy : )

You and me, we've both got sins
I don't care about where you've been
Don't be sad and don't explain
This is where we start again

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Photo Edits 9/22/13

~ click to see larger ~

I'm boarding up the windows
locking up my heart
it's like every time the wind blows
I feel it tearing us apart

Hurricane - Bridgit Mendler

stop thinking about
the easy way out
there's no need to
go and blow the candle out

Lullaby - Nickelback

I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naive

Superman - Five for Fighting

All photos taken by myself or my younger sister (thank you for putting up with me, Meg!)
Edited using PicMonkey

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Neglecting the Gift

* I know my last post was really deep, too, but these things needed to be said. 
Maybe I'll make a post about my boyfriend tomorrow to lighten things up.
You never know.

So I'm sitting on my bed, reading the daily readings. I start with the First Reading, because, obviously, that's the order things go in. I flip to 1 Timothy 4, and read verses 12-16.

Right there in the middle. Underlined with the dark black pen.

Do not neglect the gift you have. 

This line is very convicting for me. Unlike Timothy, my gifts weren't conferred on me through 'prophetic word' or by 'the imposition of hands' (at least, not that I know of...). My gifts are the garden variety, I suppose. I write, I draw, I paint, I take pictures, I sew, I knit, I -

- no, wait.

I talk about doing those things. 

I've had several very long, very irritatingly true conversations with my boyfriend about the fact that I never finish things that I write, and that's pretty much because I just...don't write.

I talk about a lot of things, but I mostly do the following things, which are neither constructive, nor do they make me truly happy:

1. Go on the internet/computer (a lot).

2. Eat.

3. Complain.

I know I'm far from being the only young adult/teenager who suffers from this horrible condition of procrastination and mediocrity, while at the same time dying to be amazing and productive. 

But, as Spider Man always says no matter how many times they retell his tragic story through animation and live-action movies: "With great power comes great responsibility."


Translation: Spider Man's power was his 'gift'. 

So, too, with OUR great gifts, come great responsibilities. 

And its not exactly very responsible to neglect something only you have the ability to do, right? 

I ask you - what if Spider Man had sat around all the time watching movies instead of crawling up walls and fighting crime? 

Confession time:

I neglect my gifts. 

I shamelessly let them sit around, gathering dust in my closet and under my bed, because creating things and practicing things and DOING things - well, that takes work. And my natural, sinful inclination towards laziness and selfishness makes me want to avoid the work of exercising my gifts and just sit around doing nothing instead. 

I know better than anyone that doing nothing makes me unhappy. It makes me sick. It makes me feel genuinely repulsed towards myself. Because I was not made to do nothing; I was given a specific and very unique set of gifts that will enable me to do, quite literally, EVERYTHING I was put on this earth TO do. 


And I have first-hand evidence of how freaking AWESOME doing things can be.

I get to see a play that I WROTE being PERFORMED next month! I'm going to have to sit in the audience with a sock shoved in my mouth or something because if no one else laughs, I'll feel like an idiot. But this immense, beautiful blessing has only been given to me by God because I put in the work and effort to USE MY GIFT and write a short play. 

I am going to go back to Italy after only two years! Because I'm working my butt of to make enough money to go, and because I want to experience more of it. 

When we neglect our gifts, we are harming ourselves more than anything else. We'll never be truly happy. But at the same time, we are robbing the world of something only we can do/be. When we write our gifts off as hobbies (GUILTY), we are eliminating the possibility of ever letting the world see the glory of God in what He can do through us. 

My prayer in the midst of all these reflections is that I would stop neglecting my gifts. I pray that I would see how precious my time and talents are, and how quickly they will be gone if I neglect them. I spent the last two days downright sad and being very mean to myself, because, doing nothing, I was left feeling repulsed with myself. 

And that's not to say that we are only good if we are productive. That would suck. But it IS to say that because we are capable of letting God do great things through us, we should. 

It is the only responsible thing to do with these gifts we are empowered with - to use them, and to use them for the greater good, which only God can define. 

In the spirit of doing/creating things - I made this last night. I haven't had time with my suddenly very busy work schedule to make anything actually impressive, but I did have time to do some photo-editing with some song lyrics I really like. 

I am flawed
but I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now
the things you swore
you saw yourself

Vindicated - Dashboard Confessional

Edited with my good friend PicMonkey.
(click to see larger)

God bless your weekend; use your gifts!

Monday, September 16, 2013

The Weight of Glory

holding hands gif | via Tumblr
"There are no ordinary people. 
You have never talked to a mere mortal. 
Nations, cultures, arts, civilization—these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. 
But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit—immortal horrors or everlasting splendors. 
This does not mean that we are to be perpetually solemn. 
We must play. 
But our merriment must be of that kind 
(and it is, in fact, the merriest kind) 
which exists between people who have, from the outset, taken each other seriously — no flippancy, no superiority, no presumption. 
And our charity must be real and costly love, with deep feeling for the sins in spite of which we love the sinner—no mere tolerance or indulgence which parodies love as flippancy parodies merriment. 

Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbor is the holiest object presented to your senses."

The Weight of Glory - C. S. Lewis

Saturday, September 14, 2013

Beneath Your Beautiful - Labrinth feat. Emeli Sandé

This is my current favorite song. I have four versions of it pinned to my Music board on Pinterest. I know all the words. I have read very deep meaning into it that might not have been intended by the song's author.

Sometimes,  I don't feel good enough for myself, so I don't believe I'm good enough for someone else. So I put on masks, and build walls. I hide my imperfections behind my 'beautiful'...until I find someone who insists that they see beneath it.

This song.

You tell all the boys "No"
Makes you feel good, yeah.
I know you're out of my league
But that won't scare me away, oh, no

You've carried on so long,
You couldn't stop if you tried it.
You've built your wall so high
That no one could climb it,
But I'm gonna try.

Would you let me see beneath your beautiful?
Would you let me see beneath your perfect?
Take it off now, girl, take it off now, girl
I wanna see inside
Would you let me see beneath your beautiful tonight?

You let all the girls go
Makes you feel good, don't it?
Behind your Broadway show
I heard a boy say, "Please, don't hurt me"

You've carried on so long,
You couldn't stop if you tried it.
You've built your wall so high
That no one could climb it,
But I'm gonna try.


I'm gonna climb on top your ivory tower
I'll hold your hand and then we'll jump right out
We'll be falling, falling but that's OK
'Cause I'll be right here
I just wanna know...


Wednesday, September 11, 2013


9/11, always, me, remember

Why is it important for us to remember 9/11? 

Because it hurt us. 

It is important that we do not ignore the suffering that this act of terrorism and violence caused. Thousands of people lost their lives on 9/11/01, and we honor their memory by praying for them and praying for their friends and families.

I think there are a lot of people who cannot forgive what happened on 9/11. I was almost seven years old on September 11, 2001, and I remember my mom explaining to me that someone had flown a plane into a building. I didn't fully understand, and, to be honest, it didn't really effect me. I lived in Iowa and didn't even know what terrorism was.

Now that I'm older, looking back on 9/11 makes me very sad, because I think about how, for many people, today marks 12 years of remembering a horrific tragedy in their lives. It's easier for me to forgive, because I wasn't directly hurt by it.

We have been forgiven by God, and therefore, have the power to forgive everyone who hurts us. Even, and especially, terrorists. I pray for all the victims, and all the survivors. We learned so much from 9/11, and we won't forget. But we must forgive. 

Monday, September 9, 2013


I was at work today when I was told I had a phone call. I almost never get calls at work, so I was curious. It was my mother. She apologized for bothering me while I was working (Mom, you should know I am NEVER going to be annoyed at you for breaking up the monotony of my shifts, I promise!), but an e-mail had just come in from Words Players

My play, Favorite Color, has been selected for the One Act Play Festival, October 11th and 12th at 7pm. Out of many plays submitted from all over the United States, mine is one of SEVEN that was chosen.

If you think I'm freaking out, you are absolutely right.

I have never had anything I've written published before, and this totally counts as publication in my book. REAL LIVE PEOPLE are going to perform my play in front of a REAL LIVE AUDIENCE.

I'm just so happy and honestly very SHOCKED that my play was chosen. I received some very negative feedback about it, but I made the choice to preserve it the way it was and trust that the beauty I saw in it would be evident to other people. 

Above all, I am so grateful to God for this immense blessing and honor, and I only hope that everyone who sees my play will be blessed by it. 

What a great way to start the week, right?

Thursday, September 5, 2013

Praying for Peace

I am often very preoccupied with my own very tiny portion in this world. So preoccupied, in fact, that I do not remember that there are people living every day in fear, not knowing if they will see tomorrow. The people in Syria and Egypt need God's saving power, not more violence from another source directed at another target.  

Pope Francis I has asked all the people of the world (not just Catholics, not just Christians, but any human person who desires peace on earth) to PRAY FOR PEACE.

We are a broken, fallen world. We need to beg our God, through the intercession of all the Angels and Saints, and Mary, Queen of Heaven, to rescue us. To show His faithfulness, mercy, and love yet again. He has never failed us. We need Him. 

"Lord Jesus Christ, who are called the Prince of Peace, who are yourself our peace and reconciliation, who so often said, "Peace to you," grant us peace. Make all men and women witnesses of truth, justice and brotherly love. Banish from their hearts whatever might endanger peace. Enlighten our rulers that they may guarantee and defend the great gift of peace. May all peoples on the earth become as brothers and sisters. May longed-for peace blossom forth and reign always over us all."
(Blessed John XXIII)

Wednesday, September 4, 2013