Cookies for Clare

Today I went to work for the first time in a week. 

I was scheduled 10-4, which was rather inconvenient for everyone (meaning myself and my parents) because, if I only worked later, my dad could pick me up and my mom wouldn't have to make an extra trip to town.

Well, without any effort or gumption on my part, I managed to pick up 3 extra hours and stay until 7! Go me! I was fine with that because it meant I got three breaks instead of one, which is always nice, especially when you aren't feeling 100%, anyway.

Apparently this was a much bigger deal to my parents than a realized, because when my dad heard I had managed to pick up hours, he told my mom to make me cookies.

And she did.

They are amazing.

Don't quote me, but I BELIEVE they are oatmeal chocolate chip. There appears to be coconut in them, too. Whatever is in them, they're just really, really good.

I think this is the first time anyone has made cookies for me personally.

Its a wonderful feeling. 

The cookies are also a perfect way to celebrate the fact that it is my feast day! Today is the feast of St. Mary Magdalene, who I chose as my confirmation saint!

I hope your week has gotten off to as great a start as mine. 

Superior

(Me on the beach, and my bucket list for this trip layered over the top.)

For the past 6 days, I have been way up in Northern Wisconsin visiting my mom's parents!

Wisconsin is my favorite state that I have ever been in (although, truthfully, I've only been in 5 of the 50). It is absolutely beautiful here! Lake Superior is the biggest (and COLDEST) of all the Great Lakes, and I spent 3 days there this past week.

Family, food, fun -- and mosquito bites, but that sort of comes with the territory.

So far....

I got an amazing graduation gift from my Grandma.

I got serious Sister Points. (Happy Birthday, Terese!)

I got a sunburn. (Blah)

I got a carving tool for making rubber stamps.

I got to see my older sister and her boyfriend.

I got to eat a bacon and jelly sandwich (which, trust me, tastes way better than it sounds).

I got to sit for hours and talk to my Grandpa, pretty much the coolest guy on the planet.

I got to talk to my boyfriend on the phone on the 3rd anniversary of him telling me he liked me. <3

I got to see a few illegal fireworks, but some very beautiful (and tall) pine trees prevented me from seeing any of the real displays.

I got a lot of pictures of shoes and feet.

I got to see a bunch of my cousins, and confuse one of them with the color chartreuse. 

I got to watch two of my sisters fit their mouths around the rim of a glass cups. (More entertaining then you'd expect.)

I got to watch the movie Wreck-it-Ralph for the second time. ("What's going on inside of this candy-coated heart of darkness!?")

I got to see the art of an internationally famous artist.

And I got to go to Mass in one of the most beautiful churches I've ever seen. 

It's been a Superior trip so far, and we still have 2 whole days left!

I hope you are having a summer even half as lovely as mine. God bless!

Father's Day 2013

I pray that God would give strength to all fathers today, but especially mine, to be able lead and love their families as they are called to. 

I love my dad. He has always been there for me. He has always prayed for me. He is so proud of me. He is my biggest fan. I have never doubted that I am precious to him, and that he wants nothing but the best for me in both this life and the next.

He is not perfect, and there have been times when I've been very angry and frustrated with him. But he is so good at loving me, and all my siblings. He has showed us, imperfectly, but genuinely, how we deserve to be loved and cared for. 

I stole this idea for a Father's Day card, and here's how it turned out --

Happy Father's Day, Dad. I love you and I am so grateful for the ways you have helped to make me who I am. 

God bless you. : )

Mother's Day 2013

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My mom has nine children, of which I am the third. Three of her children have thrown up in the past 24 hours. She hasn't slept through the night in weeks. The cat just figured out a way to get into our house from the garage. She drives me to work whenever I need her to. She paid for my passport when I went to Italy. She cleaned the mold out of my shower because I was too busy (and lazy) to do it. She deals with every emotional breakdown her many daughters have each week. She is supportive of all our hopes and dreams and gives us good advice.

Seriously, if there is one woman who deserves Mother's Day, it is MY mom.

To my wonderful Mommy. I love you so very much and I am so grateful for my life and the lives of all my brothers and sisters. You are amazing and I hope I can make you proud by the way I live the life you gave me.

Love,

Your Clare

Happy Valentine's Day 2013

Today has been wonderful, especially because I am loved by God. In response to this, I made Him a Valentine.

"A VALENTINE?" You may say. "For GOD!?"

Why not? I love Him more than anyone else in the universe, so the least I can do is glue a little paper Valentine into my journal for Him!

In other news, I received plenty of chocolate to keep me from being overly penitential during this Lent (thank you, Steve!), and watched the movie Anastasia with my younger sister instead of writing history and literature papers. It has been a LOVELY day.

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone, and may God bless you and show you how deeply you are loved!

"In this is love: 

not that we have loved God, 

but that he loved us 

and sent his Son 

as expiation for our sins."

- 1 John 4: 10

My wonderful weekend

This past weekend I interviewed with NET Ministries, because I feel that God is calling me to serve His Kingdom by ministering to youth who are in need of His love.

This weekend was absolutely fantastic. There were moments of great pain where the Devil tried to steal my peace in God's plan for me, but my Blessed Mother came to my rescue and her prayers helped me to trust again. I had so much fun, I grew closer to Christ, and I made some unbelievably awesome friends who I hope to keep for years, no matter who gets accepted this year.

One of my new friends, a magnificent young lady named Melina, I have actually been able to keep in touch with right away via e-mail, and I learned that she is a singer-songwriter slowly trying to work her way into the Christian music industry. Her videos are fantastic, and I wanted to share with all of you the one video that is my favorite so far. Please watch her videos and like them if you have a Youtube account (I do not)! She's trying to get 500 views this year, and she has a really beautiful voice :)

Melina is such a beautiful witness to God's unfailing love. I am honored to call her my friend. We're really different; she's confident and accomplished, I'm kind of goofy and procrastinating. But we share a common desire for Christ and His will above anything else. No one can take our Lord from us, no matter how we suffer or struggle in this life.

Please keep Melina, myself, and about 55 other young men and women who applied for NET this past weekend. We all desire to serve God in this way, and it is a journey that will take faith and strength, accepted or not.

In other news, my younger sister got back from Rome the Friday I was gone at my NET interview, and she bought me a gorgeous scarf and a big pile of Italian candy (I LOVE YOU MEG!!). I am starting my second semester of senior year. And that's about it!

God bless, and take care!

2012 and 2013

I am willing to go out on a limb and say that this has been the best year of my life so far.

So much has happened, I've grown so much, seen so much, and learned so much, its just incredible. 

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Last year on this day I was in Rome, Italy. This time around, my younger sister will be going in January!


So I started off this year in another country. My trip to Rome was the scariest, bravest, hardest, and most exciting thing I've ever done. I went because God asked me to, and I don't know exactly how it changed me, but it did. I got to see the body of St. Clare of Assisi, whom I am named after, I got to see Pope Benedict XVI from about five feet away, and I discovered the most magical substance on the face of the earth...Strawberry Gelato!

A lot of other amazing things happened this year, and terrible, hard things, too.

I moved twice in the past two years, met someone mildly famous who I admire, cut my hair too short three times in a row, went to the funeral of a wonderful friend, saw my first friend for an afternoon, spent a week with my best friend and his family, continued to work at a grocery store, applied for Catholic ministry work, procrastinated and slacked off in my studies, said goodbye to a lot of friends going to college, bought a laptop named Quincy, thought I had my wallet stolen, attended an amazing art class, made Pascal from the movie Tangled out of wire, wrote a 50,000 word novel in 30 days, went to a Britt Nicole concert, saw no movies in the theater, ate my weight in egg roles, rediscovered my favorite musical, caught up with my extended family, read a bunch of stunning books....and basically fell more in love with God.

I am looking forward to 2013. I have an interview in January with a United States based missionary organization, and if I get excepted, I'll spend nine months serving the Church by sharing my faith with young people. I will probably find a new job since mine is starting to cost me due to gas money, and I might actually get a driver's license. Maybe.
I will graduate sometime in the spring, and while I have no plans for going to college yet, I recently took my ACT and will find out my scores soon. My options are open.

I have no idea what God has in store for me, but I'm excited. He has a perfect plan, and He has never, ever let me down. I am secure in Christ, and I will continue to try and serve Him above all things, and become a saint.

As I usually do at the end of each year, I like to pick a favorite song or a song that really sums up how I feel about this year and next year. This is extremely difficult for me as I run on music and its been a whole 365 days of awesome songs. But, like I said, I went to a Britt Nicole concert this past fall, and it was really inspiring for me. Britt Nicole is an amazing young woman who has given God her all, and at her concert she said something kind of awesome. She said that no matter how big our dreams are, God's dreams for us are bigger. That is definitely true for my life; I have no idea where I'm going, I'm dreaming too small. But I will follow God wherever His dreams for me will go.

Basically, Britt Nicole is awesome, and I hope I can see her perform live again someday.

So, my song this year is from her. Enjoy, God Bless you, and Happy New Year 2013!

~Merry Christmas 2012~

I haven't been posting much, but I've been a little busy and a lot blessed. 

Yesterday I had to work, but I was able to go home early enough to go to Christmas Eve Mass with my family. It was so beautiful and I was so overflowing with joy. My sister told me, "You were absolutely giddy in Mass yesterday!" Father gave an awesome homily about the humility of St. Joseph. 

This morning, I was saying, "Happy Birthday, Jesus!" And my little sister asked, "So, how old is Jesus now?"

I actually tried to give her an answer, being the crazy woman that I am...

"Um...let me see...roughly 2,036 years? I think?"

I don't think I'm right, I was only making a rough guesstimate of how many years it had been since God was born as a baby. No big deal.

It's been a good Christmas. I received a lot of wonderful gifts (including mini peanut butter cups!), and everyone liked their presents from me. My older sister even liked the neon pink hippo Pillow Pet I got her! Success!

Here is my favorite Christmas song of this year; Come and Worship, performed by Bebo Norman. I love this song because it captures all the power that came with God humbling Himself and becoming man. 

More than anything this Christmas, I am blown away by love. This has probably been the best year of my life. I wanted to share that with you by saying Merry Christmas and God bless you all!

When Can I See You Again?

As a girl with very few, very wonderful friends who all live way too far away...

When can I see you again?

(I love being able to schedule posts...I'm lining them up for the WHOLE weekend :D)

Being Catholic is so cool.

I'm staying at a Super 8 with my dad, and, just like he always does, my dad went around with his trusty little bottle of Holy Water and blessed our hotel room. All four corners, all four walls, windows and doors.

Who needs ADT when you've got Sacred H2O?

Isn't that wonderful?

Not only does my dad love me enough to bless our hotel room to keep us safe, but he is actually LIVING his faith. He is making his life a prayer. Sometimes I get really frustrated and angry with my dad, but I love how seriously he takes his faith. And its MY faith, too.

I think we Catholics ignore our awesome resources way too often; Holy Water is a powerful sacramental that can expel demons, and we can get as much as we want from our local Baptismal Fount.

I love being Catholic.

God bless you all :)

Haunting...

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Monday morning, I woke up from a really memorable dream.

I was in it, and I was the 'main character' if you will, but I wasn't me . I was somebody else (I was still named Clare, though). My parents were in it, but the only sibling I still had was Meg, and she hated me. She kept trying to run over this dog with a truck because it liked me better than her.

I also had an older brother!

Most of the dream was the usual run-of-the-mill total strangeness of all my dreams, with dead mice laying everywhere and a baby ostrich that followed me everywhere. You know. The kind of things that are too bizarre to even ponder. But there was one part in that dream that's been haunting me all week. 

As I did, unfortunately, come down with the stomach bug at 2 a.m. today, I've had a lot of time lying in bed nursing my stomach back to equilibrium to mill over it. 

I can't really describe it, because it was more of a feeling that I felt in my dream; an overwhelming sense of love, loss, and forgiveness. 

My character in the dream was, for some reason, estranged from her family, and unable to forgive them, especially her older brother. 

Enter 'the horrible accident' that occasionally pops up in my dreams.

My brother's wife, Natalie, and his newborn baby daughter were in a car accident, and it was uncertain if either of them would live.

It wasn't until then that people were talking about the baby, and I learned her name; Clare. 

My brother fled the room after getting the horrible news, and I followed him. He didn't want me to see him cry, and tried to pull away from me. But I grabbed his hand; "Come here...come here..."

He gave in and wrapped his arms around me tight and hard, like he needed to hold onto me to stay on the ground. 

We held each other and cried and cried. When I could finally speak, I said,

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't even know she had  a baby. I didn't even know her name. I'm sorry. I love you."

He couldn't answer, but held me tight and cried on my shoulder. I felt his fear and his pain.

After crying some more, I asked, "Did you name her after me?

He nodded. 

"Why?" I asked.

He just shook his head. He couldn't answer. 

I don't remember how long that lasted, but it felt like an eternity. It was the most beautiful moment in any dream I can remember. It probably doesn't sound as emotionally touching or wonderful as it felt, but that's part of what's been haunting me so much about it. 

In the end, Natalie and their daughter were alright, but Natalie lost her foot (typical dream thing, right?). 

But there was so much in that one scene of that dream. Before my alarm could wake me from it at 7, I was holding the baby, and I asked my nonexistent older brother,

"So, why did you name her after me?"

I still don't know. He gave an answer, but it didn't make any sense, and I'm not sure I even remember it right.

It was the kind of dream that captivated my imagination. It's the kind of feeling I wish I could express in words. 

I hope someday I'll be able to put this haunting scene in a suitable context, but for now, it's still just a feeling. There are no words. 

~

Dropping like flies...

It started this morning.

I came downstairs and was immediately commisioned to cuddle siblings on the couch as they watched cartoons. My little sister Ella came over and snuggled right up to me.

It was later, as I was eating breakfast, that I learned that Ella had spent the time before I came downstairs puking.

Oh boy.

Ella puked on and off all morning.

Next to fall was Joseph.

Then Isaac.

Then Terese.

And then, my dad got home early, and slumped through the door announcing he had a sick stomach and had to leave work at 3:30.

Now it's just myself, my mother, my sister Meg, and my baby brother Jacob. 

The house is filled with the horrible sounds of people intermittently moaning and puking into ice cream buckets.

The whole place is filled with this awful atmosphere of suffering and fear.

Okay, it's not that bad, but Meg is acting like it's the bubonic plague and we must avoid catching it at all costs. I myself have consumed enough garlic to sicken a lab rat. Raw garlic is the only effective substance to keep one from getting sick. I haven't caught the stomach flu in over two years because of garlic, but you never know. 

Needless to say, my breath could KILL the said lab rat. 

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However, I can think of no better time to be suffering, even if I'm not the one puking, than during Lent. Sometimes you just have to pick up the cross...even when the cross is a puke bucket. 

Hopefully it'll all be over soon, and those of us who are still standing don't get it.

Prayers would be appreciated. 

Breaking News...

The Masked Offender has returned!

That's the good part, I guess...

Well, we did it.

We rented Tangled from our local Redbox and my mom, sister, and brother (the only one's who hadn't seen it) finally got to enjoy the spectacle for themselves.

We watched it twice, just to get our money's worth.

I forgot how much I loved it.

OK...that's a lie. I remembered EXACTLY how much I loved it, watching it a second and third time just RENEWED my love for it.

It was really, truly epic seeing the movie in 3-D with two very close friends. But you know what?

It was even better watching it with my family, especially my mom and older sister. I care very much what both of them think of everything I do, say, and like.

Of course, there were cons. Like my little sisters going around quoting the most annoying line in the whole movie OVER AND OVER AND OVER.........

Mom was a little ho-hummy over it. She liked it fine, but it wasn't SO awesome in her eyes.

Anna loved it, too : ). YAY! I was so hoping she would, after I practically spoiled the whole thing for her, having her listen to the songs (taken out of context so they wouldn't ruin it for her...but all that did was confuse her). We had just about the same favorite parts. I was so happy.

Which is lame, right? I shouldn't care so much what people think.

But I do. Its the way I am.

So, what is this post about?

Um....well, my undying love for this epic movie, I guess, and my undying love for my family.

One of my favorite lines in this whole movie is, "Well, that's the good part I guess. You get to go find a new dream."

Watching this movie is awesome to me, no matter what. I laugh, I tear up, I sigh with happiness, I wince in horror and cover my mouth with my hands and just sit there, grinning like an idiot, eyes all shiny because its just BEAUTIFUL.

(You knew I was obsessed, right?)

But watching it with my family, who always chatter and laugh and won't shut up and TOTALLY ruin the most heartbreaking, beautiful moment in the whole thing and than insist on repeating all the funny lines WHILE the movie is still going on and whining that they have to go to the bathroom.....

That's the good part, I guess.

That's the part that really makes it worthwhile.

Thanks, Disney. Well done.

: )